Monday, August 30, 2010

Time to upgrade Gaius and Lum! (Jointed Hands and instruments!)

So I decided to get jointed hands for the two dolls I play with the most.... Gaius and Lum.

I've had a rough time lately and I need to be able to focus on something I enjoy. Jointed hands will really increase what I can do with Gaius and Lum.

It makes so much sense to upgrade Gaius especially because he is a musical genius and plays all kinds of instruments. Lum is getting jointed hands so he can be more expressive. He is a performer.
Here is Gaius with one of his guitars
Playing with D60 for the first time - 04

Dikadoll-MSD-Jointed Hands
I have tried the boy short nail hands (first set on the left) on Gaius and I did not care for how pudgy/rounded the palm was. I noticed the palm for the girl hands are much more streamline so I decided to get girl hands for both Gaius and Lum.

I did decide to get the long nail hands for Lum and the normal nail hands for Gaius. I am very excited about the resin match. I am hopefull the resin match for Gaius will be pretty good (Cereberus Project Normal Skin paired with DikaDoll Normal Pink Skin). I am pretty sure that Lum will not match very well though. (Cereberus Project Beauty White paird with DikaDoll White) I think the White is a much more stark paper white than the creamy white which CP uses. That should be ok though... the MSC I have right now will make them match better once I spray the hands and the MSC has time to oxodize/uv exposure.

I am also pretty sure I will be modifying the nails on Lum's hands to be less.... fake witch claw-like. They will probably end up being square cut... maybe.... we'll see

Dikadoll-MSD-Jointed Hands-Resin Match
Here is Dika's photo for resin match...

I have also found a drum set which I am dieing to get for Gaius. It "should" be in scale except maybe the stool....
It is supposed to be in scale with the 10" guitars I already have for Gaius. I asked for some measurements and the drum sticks are 1" long (decently scaled). The base drums are 5" in diameter (which seems about right). But the stool is only 1.5" tall... and that seems a bit short, but of all the items to be off in scale... that would be the one I'd choose. I can make my own stool easier than any part of the drum set.

There are also a good number of Guitars I would like to get... but that will have to wait (and I need to narrow down which ones I want)
I know I definitely at least want to get this one for Miyavi (Its very close to one he plays)

( 4126V) ~> ( 4272V)  

Monday, August 23, 2010

The ever elusive ____

君が待っているなら。。。 ずっと君を探している
It will be a hard day, but it just has to happen
I will try to believe that "you" are still out there somewhere.
"You", who are wanted by everyone even on the smallest level...even if they won't admit it.... "you" who are so sought after
Yet we can't seem to find "you" in each other
Don't give up, because I can't.
Ashley-Random-Hearts - 41
I have to keep believing that you're there
... believing that you'll find me
... believing that you'll stay
... believing that you'll last
... believing that you're not the tooth fairy
( 4113V) ~> ( 4126V)  

Total randomness

I was listening to audio from my YouTube favorites and ran across this remix. I just love this song.

I'm definitely not like GlaDos but I love the part where she says "Well you've found me... congratulations... was it worth it?........ The only thing you've managed to break so far....... is my heart"

She sounds like a scorned woman whose had her heart thrown to the dogs before. Broken, but still has the will to pull out the glue again.

I also laughed quite hard when I found the comment on the video above.... 
(you won't get it if you haven't played the game)
"I work at aperture and all those GlaDos do is get crazy, its fun playing with portal guns... p.s. (help me)"

This week is going to be crazy for me, I can feel it. 
But I also have a feeling that I will have some sort of resolution to this turmoil I have been in for the past few months. 

I don't know which way the scale will tip. I only know one thing:
I just want it to be over.

( 4003V) ~> ( 4113V) 

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Wear your heart on your sleeve

I have so many words that go with this, but then I realized there's no point to writing them. They won't mean anything or change anything.

There are those that should read them and take them to heart - they won't visit here to read or comprehend my words.
and then...
There are those that care and will read my words and take them to heart even though they aren't meant for them.

Its all on them to act, there's nothing more I can do. I've done more than all I know I could have done.
To those around me:
Say what is in your heart, unfold that paper heart and wear it on your sleeve. Say it loudly and proudly. 
For me, not hearing it is worse than taking any painful word you may have to say.
I take it all, the good and bad. Sharing of both helps strengthen relationships. It helps us know each other. I've slowly begun to learn this and thank you to those who have listened to my woes as of late. 
(and to those who didn't hear them... please don't worry. This is new to me.... I've never had much worrying to do and when I did, I was fine dealing with it internally)

No matter your level of involvement.... for every little bit counts.
Thanks you to the ones who always support me, love me for me, and believe in me.
Mom, Dad, Jeff, Kelly, JP, Darby, Jesse, Erich, Dan, Rien, Rod, Dagger, Elissaios, Allie, Chris, Pete, Roy, Pam, Bambi, Cretia, Christine, Janice, my 526 YouTube Subscribers......
You help keep my rainbow heart shining bright.
(given my horrible memory... I'm sure I accidentally left someone out...)
You'll forgive me cause you love me right? lol

<3 you all

( 3963V) ~> ( 4003V)

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Replacing one discareded thing, and finding I've lost another

 Yesterday I re-posted an old blog post yesterday which I had taken down years ago... not too long after I had put it up.

It was full of feelings and intent that were shot down within the next few days of its posting, so in anger I took it down. I thought it didn't matter if they saw it. I don't know if they did, and wished they had. It may of made a difference.

I also seem to of lost something dear to me, which.... I also believe I got rid of when I was upset. I hope I find it when I (hopefully) move soon.

My future is so full of un-certain hopes. Uncertain not only in their fruition, but in form as well.
( 3913V) ~> ( 3963V)

Monday, August 16, 2010

Things that Were : Things that Waver

So many things aren't the way they were

feelings / disconnected
inspirations / decayed
comforts / disoriented

Where did they go?
Why did they go?
Will they come back?

disconnected / feelings
decayed / inspirations
disoriented / comforts

Opposites cannot exist without each other, but
do they have to always be so one-sided?

( 3739V) ~> ( 3913V)

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Clean Sweep: Designing a happier existence

There are a number of things I am thinking of doing to change my life, Mostly to make a happier, healthier, smarter me.

Move to a new place
I am looking to move to Capitol Hill, but am beginning to think I may get a small studio and transform it into my creative place. My creative Studio (and I don't mean just the apartment size), my place of sanctuary. My hub of creativity.

There are a few priorities I want for the new place.
  • Apartment located in Capitol Hill
    • Preferrably near Broadway, Trader Joe's, and Fenris's
  • Space for my Art Desk area (I may get an easel)
    • I plan on totally waterproofing the area so I can go to town and do some crazy care free painting. 
  • Deck area
    • so I can have a place to spray MSC and such
  • Hard wood floors
    • Easier for Waffles
    • Fun for sliding around on socks
    • Looks better and easier to clean
    • May get a Rhoomba for Waffles to ride
  • Parking
    • I may end up getting a motorcycle or scooter or car.... we'll see
  • Lighting
    • I want to make good lighitng a priority for taking photographs, so Waffles can see, and because it would be great to not be in a dark place like I am now.
Get a Cintiq 12WX
 I would love to get back into more photo editing/digital art work. I think I could dramatically improve upon where I was when I last did any. Here are some examples of what Ive done before (using a Intuos, not Cintiq)

Get a DSLR Camera
I'm thinking of getting a DSLR soon, and in doing so I am thinking of going through my iPhoto library and cleaning out everything that isn't a memorable or an amazing photo.

I mean... having almost 100,000 photos is a bit much.... lol
(keep in mind not all of these are photos I took, but a LOT of them are)

I haven't decided which DSLR I want to get yet... but I am debating between a Nikon D90 and a Canon T2i
I was able to play with a Nikon D60 (thanks Lee) yesterday and took some ok pictures. I definitely will improve with time ^____^

( 3720V) ~> ( 3739V)

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Bullshit: I haz much hate for you

I have come to a conclusion in regards to bullshit.

I don't care to be around it
I don't care to be involved with it..... in fact I'm quite simply just don't care to cater to its existence.

You're not worth my time (period)

( 3640V) ~> ( 3720V)